I’m afraid I haven’t got one. Or much of one. I often think that what I have been operating from all or most of my life is seriously flawed. I don’t know much about balance and/or expectations that is both healthy and profitable. I think that ‘having something to do’ sounds like the old people’s home. (These ARE confessions). Which leads to several misconceptions about old people that being one exposes.
My mother was Swedish and ‘coffee time’ was as ritualistic as the Latin siesta. She worked hard and fast, but when coffee time rolled around, she took a break. I have often been thankful for this example of work and rest, but also found it hard to not let the steady stream of duties eat at me. Or feel like I’m being a slacker, especially when around other people who don’t know how to take a break. The fact is, I like break time a lot better than work time. Why don’t I like working? Is it because I’m just basically a lazy person? Why do I see certain tasks as a waste of time and energy? I know enough about work to know that certain kinds bring me joy. But it’s hard for me to take joy in Doing some things that will benefit me for being Done. And some mundane everyday things I take joy in, most people I know never do, like hanging clothes on the line and making bread, and it seems superfluous to take the time to do them.
So what if I were to reconstruct my philosophy of work, instead of bemoaning it? Could I come up with something that would work for a young mother, a busy 40 something, And a 60 something like me? I do think in a context of women, because that’s what I am. I don’t know if men ever stress about this in anything like the way women do. Does a philosophy work whether you get up and go to work at the same time every day or stay home? If you read books all day for your job or manufacture something? Sometimes we (as humanity) fall into the trap of thinking that what works best for us is what is best. Period. Maybe what works best for us is best for us but people are different.
I think my biggest problem is that what has motivated me most of the time is what other people will think of me. I can give lip service to the audience of One, but I forget about it most of the time. So when I find myself at home a lot, by myself, what motivates me? Am I just in the wrong place for an extrovert like me? Is it just that I have ADD or a stink pile of bad , twisted attitudes?
QuidNunc/QuidTunc? 